Chapter 3.
Love Makes You Distant..
I wake up to the loud sizzling sound of bacon and eggs; my dad's Saturday Breakfast and I'm not gonna lie it's really appetizing! Each morning I go through the previous days events and today is no exception. As I lay in bed, reflecting on yesterday I suddenly remember that today is the day; I'm meeting Thomas Belton at my local, ancient theme park. My current mood is not the ' I don't give a fuck' it's more of a ' I'll put a little more effort into my first date' kinda thing. Unhurriedly I clamber of of my bed and land on my Mount Clothes that is gradually getting smaller- only because yesterday I stayed up 'till 3am cleaning my disastrous bedroom. My original idea was to wear the cleanest pair of jeans I could find and a hoodie, however I'm feeling like a short sleeved top would do just fine. I cross the bridge of books to my vanity and pop on some mascara I got for Christmas last year and my favourite matte lip gloss, check it in the mirror and notice bottomless cuts on the inside of my left arm.
*How could you be so stupid Amber? Going on a date right after that? Idiot!* The cuts are from me self-harming. I couldn't help but cut after I escaped from the hospital. It all just got too much for me and a 14 year old teenage girl couldn't hold the keys away.
*Well you're wearing a hoodie then..If you can find one!*
I take over 15 minutes searching for a semi-clean hoodie and then finally I discover one right behind my bed, I think it fell behind there over 3 years ago. That chapter of my life was happy; my family loved me and I still had a best friend and a healthy mind. Poison is trapped within it now, cutting is and addiction- it's a key to controlling my pain and holding back the unneeded tears soaking my cheeks with the flaming acids.. Right, I grab my favourite hair brush and run it through my thick, autumn colored hair- that's the only part of me that I like- my hair. Once I'm done I step out of my room to find a pair of shoes already at my door with a small note inside one of them. The note says:
" To Amber,
Go to the shop to get some milk plz becoze i want my cofy this morning and u know i luv milk wiv it.
From: jason."
Ugh. My brother Jason, only 2 years younger than me and yet is hideous at spelling! I carelessly throw the note over the dark oak wood banister and run down the stairs, straight out the door into the cooling Autumn breeze. I head straight to the theme park which is luckily only 25 minutes away from my house is I walk at a constant speed.
As I walk down my road many elder people casually walking past give an ol' smile but I rudely ignore- right now all I can think is Thomas and I think I might just be falling for him. As I come to a halt at the crossing I become aware of my thoughts and how distant I actually am from the world.
Blinding_Pastel x
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